Paper work
So I was back on the job for the first time on Monday. I was really looking forward to it, but the day was affected, unhappily affected, by the administration officer charged with handling my reinstatement. Administration officer, did I say?
You can’t start today, Mr Gordon, she said.
Why not? I wanted to know.
Because your contract’s not ready.
I don’t care, I said. I trust the commissioner. He will keep his word.
Yes, but in terms of labour law your contract has to be in order first.
With that she pulled a contract out of a file on her desk. It had my name at the top. There it is, I said happily.
She turned to page fifty three and pointed to the last line on the contract. He hasn’t signed it, she said.
Well – I was trying to sound reasonable (everyone knows I am a reasonable person) – let’s take it down the passage, I said to her, and give it to the commissioner’s PA. She will give it to him and he will sign it.
But he’s sick today, she said. He’s having an operation to remove his wisdom teeth. The commissioner struggles terribly with his teeth.
Are you telling me I can’t start work today because the commissioner’s at the dentist?
It’s much more serious than going to the dentist, she said. But he’ll be back tomorrow.
You want me to start tomorrow?
She had another look at my contract. That’s a problem, she said.
What now?
It has today’s date on it. You have to start today.
Good.
But you can’t. The commissioner hasn’t signed it.

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